Rough Draft

All the small things,
Truth cares, truth brings.
I'll take one lift,
Your ride best trip.

Okay, quick post. Yes, my planned hiatus failed. It lasted for quite a while but then again, I didn't revised much in the end.

First things first, congratulations to Chelsea Football Club for winnng the Premiership for the second time in a row. But look out, cause that would be most probably your last one before my beloved Manchester United launch a fightback next season.

Secondly, time check. 3 more days to the exams. Halfway through A-Maths, I aim to finish differentiation and intergration today.

Oh yes, Dong Li Huo Che is currently my #1 favourite Chinese band now. I think my father's taste rocks. He actually rejected Jay Chou's music (most probably because of a lil' hiphop). But hey, he listens to classier un-whiney music like Dong Li Huo Che and Wu Bai.

Always, I know.
You'll be at my show.
Watching, waiting,
Commiserating.

PLMGSS band concert was a tad better than what I expected. And I wore my long sleeved white shirt. I felt somehow rich but that feeling disappeared immediately after I stepped into the MRT. One day, I'mma drive my own red, hot Lamborghini.

Scored two out of twenty plus goals this Saturday. Poor show by me, I didn't even dribbled once okay. Then again, I wasn't in the mood to play. I feel really lethargic these days. And I think I'm typing a load of crap now.

Today's service is one of the better ones I had been to. Mark Conner's a fantastic preacher with a great sense of humor. Great sermon today.

Say it ain't so,
I will not go,
Turn the lights off,
Carry me home.

Okay, I thought I had lots to write today, but it seems empty up there. I'm off to start on my essay for Emerge Conference. I'll be up the entire night, most probably, and I wouldn't mind some company. (:

Replies to tags:

Sandy: I've no idea how to accede to your request, hoho. Wong Shan Yi. (:

Kelly: The books bit me and they're happy. ):

Carey: Haha, hello hello!

Qixin: And hello Qixin, my dearest mummy!

Evangeline: Haha, nah. She isn't evil. Hello usher! (:

Happy Birthday, Evee! <3

Thank you for being one of the best-est friends around. It's strange, recalling how we meet, but hey, I'm not complaining, it's just awesome knowing you. So pretty lady, here's wishing you a sweet fourteen. (:

I'm going on a hiatus. Mainly due to the exams and partly because of the stuff that took place over the course of the week. So I won't be around for well, two weeks at the very most. Not that anyone would care, but this would serve as a reminder to myself.

Beitris: Oh yes, the small pact. (:

Nicolette: Ahaha, I've great taste, everyone knows that. Nah, kidding.

Sandy: Haha, sureee. Black, white, grey, brown. Hahaha. Okay okay, I'll make it all pink and girlish okay? Oh, and I don't think I know your chinese name!

Fiona: Glad you liked it, and thanks for the sheets of paper and pen. (:

To Jeffery, hey man, don't get too stressed up alright? Let's study hard together, take the exams first before everything else.
To Junle, okay, you've a new necklace. Now now, can all three of us start studying and not get distracted? I want to get good results, but together with both of you.

Oh yes, thank you, Szefong, for talking to me and for trying to help. Take care of yourself first, get well soon!
Thank you too, Qixin! Thank you for the talk over the phone last night, it helped alot, and I still think you're more feminine now. You're the best, and let's meet up soon, yeah? (:

And to a special person (my idol!) in my life:

Kelly. (:
Hellooo girl! <3 I'm a bad friend and I don't like you! Haha, you know what? You're the only one person that I can relate everything to, the only one person that I can talk to, non-stop, online, and the only one person that offers advice I take. I'm so lucky to have you as a friend, even though we come from two totally different backgrounds and I'm grateful for everything you've taught me. Saranghaeyo. (:

So goodbye, world. Hello, oh so bitter books.

Looking back on the things I've done,
I was trying to be someone.

The past few days further opened my eyes to this world.

It's common practice to say you gonna be there for someone 24/7. But when the going gets tough, and when everything falls down, no one give a shit about you most of the time. Makes me wonder why I ever did whatever I did in the past to cheer people up, to be there for everyone, and to just help in every way I could. And look at the shit I get now. I'm blamed for everything there is to be blamed for, and I'm even blamed for being how I am to everyone else. For being nice to someone, I either get gossisp, or I get taken for granted. I get ignored and I get reprimanded. So what does everyone want? Fine if you're a stranger, I wouldn't have given a shit. But if you're someone I'm especially close to and you know I treat you like a brother or a sister, please oh please. I'd gladly get out of your life if you'd rather push all the blame to me when I'm in the dumps, for doing a disappearing act, for making me wait like a fool for half a day for just a single reply in msn or through sms, and all that when all I did was just trying to be nice.

So if you hate me or something, if you just want to see me die a horrible death, if you just want to make my life a living hell, well yeah. Tell me in the face. You can screw yourself for all I care after that.

I hate it. I just hate it when everything I do for a particular someone ends up with me being taken for granted, or just simply ignored. But no point in blaming others now. I've given it much thought during lunch time today. Maybe you're right. Maybe the problem lies with me. Maybe, just maybe, I'm really should get knocked down by a car.

You don't know how much hurt I took. It wasn't shown through my tone. But rip my body apart and you can see how chewed up my insides are. When everything I confided in you were just noise to your ears, when I never was under your catergory of friends.

People I once looked up to. People I trust my problems with. People I care so much for. People I'd do anything for. But hey, my being there's just a service free of charge, isn't it?

Makes me see who really are there when I need them. Not much, it's less than the fingers on one hand.

Oh yes, what a post. Right at YOU. Go ahead, add that to the list under things you hate me for. But hey, what a blow you've dealt me.

I was so close, that was the most that I have ever been through.
Now old cassettes and cigarettes, will be the ones to save you.
How can you ask for me to stay,
When all you ever do is go?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FIONA! (:

Any idea why your name's so colourful? Well, here's why:
You never fail to light up N293, and you're a rainbow in each and every one of our lives. Thank you for dropping by, and have a sweet sixteen! (:

I've decided to list down all the songs that I've tried to learn since the day I picked up guitar. Among them, there are many that I know only bits and parts of the song but anyway, here goes nothing.

3 Doors Down- Be Like That
Ah Niu- Dui Mian De Nu Hai
Bon Jovi- I'll Be There For You (acoustic)
Chen Han Wei- Guang Huai Fang Shi
Coheed and Cambria- Welcome Home
Goo Goo Dolls- Black Balloon
Green Day- Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)
Green Day- Wake Me Up When September Ends
James Blunt- Tears and Rain
James Blunt- You're Beautiful
Jay Chou- Qing Tian
Lifehouse- You and Me
Metallica- Fade to Black
Metallica- Master of Puppets
Metallica- Nothing Else Matters
Radiohead- Creep (acoustic)
Romance D'amour
Sum41- Hell Song
Switchfoot- Stars (acoustic)
Switchfoot & Jars of Clay- Let That Be Enough
Taking Back Sunday- Your Own Disaster
The Calling- Wherever You Will Go
Yellowcard- One Year Six Months

(Note: Not entirely familiar and for some, only certain parts of song.)

Yeah, that's about all. The rest are intros or simple solos to songs which I find no point in listing now. Right now, 3/4 of the list are strumming songs, cause to actually learn how to pluck/pick the strings of a songs takes time and I've got not much time in my hands this year to spare. So now, my priority is to get familiar with the songs in the list before trying out newer stuff. Oh, and no, if you come to me and ask me to play a particular song, I can't. This list is just a reference for me, it's my blog anyway and I use it to take note of just about everything. Play a song?Look for a real professional. (:

Today's maths test went so badly, that when others were rushing through their papers and begging for extra time, there I was (with Junle) waiting for time to tick by, slowly. Yes, our differentiation is THAT bad, and I can say that I hardly understand even one question in the paper.

Was talking to Fiona just now, and I realised there're much I haven't tasted, even in tiny Singapore. Please bring me out and dine, anyone? (: I wanna go try ramen someday! I know I know, you must be thinking HUH?! Who in the world hasn't tasted ramen in sixteen years of his life?! Heh, me. Ehhh. I tried sushi only a few months back, courtesy of Eve and Amadea okay. Don't laugh. I'm gonna travel the world one day and experience different kinds of cuisine. I'mma laugh at you, then. :D

To Junle a.k.a Hei Ren: I'm gonna study right after this entry, and regarding your finger, recover soon or no more basketball. Haha, Manchester United can win! There's still a slim chance okay. Everything is possible in the world of soccer. (:

I've a huge 'debt' of money to pay/return. Yes, I kind of like Rooney but no, I'm not into gambling. The reasons behind my debts- Half of it are books and other school-related expenses I haven't paid for while the rest include the cost of a jersey, cell fund and much more. The total sum I've to try and cough out had already hit an all-time high of over a hundred bucks. And to think I nearly went to Sakae Sushi to have lunch today.

I realise that my blog isn't that lonely afterall. People do read it, just that they come and go silently. I've nothing to hide here, feel free to read and browse around. But hey, leave a message every now and then so that I've got a faint idea of your existence around here, yeah? Till then, thank you for your visit, it makes my humble blog so much more lively. (:

Hoho. Time to kick start my revision. Goodnight. (:

This saturday's pretty much all about soccer. Went to Bedok for Joga3 Futsal, and though we didn't go through as expected, I found it to be a fruitful trip. We were knocked out very early for our first match, and drew the second. The third one was better, we were gaining momentum and Zachary scored in the dying minutes of the game from my kick-in. Yes, I did score. (: For the fourth match, I blasted the ball in to record our second win and yeah, the highlight of my game was that goal. I hit the pole for our fifth match before the other team scored when the ball was over the line but by then, the game's over so we let them stay on.

I was happy with my performance, having scored, hit the pole, and dribbled successfully past a team before being denied by a last ditch tackle. Recording down the events of this day so I can sit down and view my past acheivements when I'm old and ageing one day. Two wins, two draws, one loss.

Hello Beitris! Speaking of old and ageing, game of chess, remember? (:

Went back around five plus and played in the neighbourhood's small field and scored another goal. The sun was setting by the time I went back, ate dinner, before bathing and deciding to blog.

Well, past days events. My ear was experiencing some major hurting, and it was even bleeding for some days. Couldn't hear really clearly, but now it's okay. Special thanks to Nicolette for always asking about my ear, and making sure I'm alright, to the extent of actually believing I went to the hospital for an operation. Aww, love you. (: For the first time, your name's appearing in my blog under special mention and I bet you must be smiling silently inside cause you're always complaining that I never did once mention you. So here you are! Thank you. (:

Fiona's birthday party was great fun. The prayer meeting went on smoothly. But the two unconfirmed friends aren't coming anymore. Jethro sprained his ankle while playing basketball, while Michael has something on in the morning- breakfast in the morning and a visit to relatives. You ask, what about Steven? Oh, his father's back from overseas and he can't go, and he's got a friend to visit. So I guess, I'm heading to East Coast to drown in self-depression.

Yeah, don't get discouraged. The harvest is there. Or is it?

Okay, away with self-pity. Less than a month to the exams. I had my fair share of fun, and I'm hoping to start my revision right on monday. I know I've been saying that for forever, but yeah. Maybe I'll go on a hiatus or something. If you don't see me online, I must be studying. And you can all go, "Aww, so hardworking!"

Then again, who knows? I could be kicking away on the soccer field. (:

First things first.

Happy birthday, brother!

I love the acoustic version of this song, though the actual version is the one that got everyone else hooked. The acoustic version's actually the less well-known one, I think.

Well, I've been listening to chinese songs lately. And those who knows me well would be surprised I'd actually listen to them. Really, now that I've encountered some of the few songs that Junle and Jefferey listens to and sings in class, I think chinese songs aren't really that bad. Take away the lousy hiphop, and rapping parts away from an album and ta-daaa! Something worth listening to. Leave the rapping to the black Americans in the U.S, man. No offence, but they're superior in terms of rapping.

If it was three years ago, I'd have wiped that smirk off your face in a matter of seconds.

It happened like this:
This particular guy who had been a real ass lately, getting on my nerves and everything, "sabotaged" my friend and I today. We were required to run 8 laps round the track, and we ran 6. So with nothing to do and a childish mind combined, he counted and reported us to the teacher. True, we weren't particularly right when we skipped the last 2 rounds, but thing is, 3/4 of the entire level skipped rounds too. If it was Phillip, Nigel or even Jeffery(their difference in heights probably caused that fear), he wouldn't have dared to breathe a word. They would have beaten him up on the spot. Three years ago, I would have too. Being such a coward, hiding behind your so called "friends" and launching verbal attacks on your classmates didn't really put you as number one on the class's favourite list. But you know what? I'm gonna tolerate all the shit you'be been spouting/doing, and pay you back double one day.

Hello, Nicolette Ng. (:

Life in school terms hasn't been well. Homework undone, tests failed, attention span not lasting over half an hour. I'm afraid these are all very bad omens. Buck up, hansheng. The mid years are just round the corner.

On another note, I hope Ballack doesn't join Chelsea. I've a feeling he will though. The gap between Chelsea and Manchester United is only seven points, I can't wait for the finale to the season.

Eveeee. You're a danger to the people around you. You melt their hearts at will. (: Haha. I won't be anywhere near your house next week, I've got Joga3 Futsal. Then again, I bet you gonna be outside. Maybe we can meet up in the evening. Till then, <3.

Farewell. (:

I got back my additional maths and elementary maths test back today. I failed both, and though I don't really hold that particular maths teacher in high regard, what she said struck me. "I'm disappointed."

Yeah, a month more before the mid year exams offically starts. Less than two months and I'll be taking my chinese O's. The chinese teacher said, "I can see your A1 or A2, slipping out of your grasp slowly, becoming a B3."

I could just imagine one month later, my parents would be shaking their heads and say, "We told you what you acheived last term was just a fluke. You just can't make it, can you?"

Oh, the curse of the 'O' Levels.

Frankly, sometimes I just want to give it all up. I can't seem to find the motivation to study when I get home. I'd rather pick up the papers and look at recent footballing news, before proceeding to play some tunes on the guitar. It's not that I don't want to, it's a matter of whether I can, or not.

Been sort of moody these days. I've been playing mostly hardcore, metalcore music recently, and the slighest thing irritates the hell out of me. One particular person in class stands out, and I don't know how long it'd take before I explode and just make a bloody mess out of him. Yes, the risk of getting a pink form had been the only barrier between us.

Few people to turn to, cause there aren't many who would listen to me whining about random things. Or you can say, it's kind of hard to understand the recent patch I'm going through. Dude, you gotta get a grip on yourself, or sooner or later, one wrong move and the whole world comes crumbling down.

And yes, when that happens, I expect myself to drown under the bricks of life. You see, I'm no Hercules.

I'm hanging on every word you say,
And even if you don't want to speak tonight,
That's alright, alright with me.
Cause I want nothing more than,
To sit outside heaven's door and listen to you breathing,
Is where I want to be.

A song from one of my favorite bands of all time. Enough said.

There are some things in life that are absolutely essential to me. It's not things like what most people would answer when you shoot this question at them, practical answers like love, money, and friendship. Yes, it's true that we need them, but some things in life are just impossible to live without- for me.

Basketball-
The first sport I played in my life, basketball's the sport I dreamt of making it big in when I was in primary school. When the list of CCAs (or ECAs as it was called then) was presented to me, it was to no doubt that I would be choosing basketball. The sound of the ball swishing into the net (chop!) would be etched in my mind forever. It's impossible to not feel proud of those shots and it's that feeling of elation and the possibility of hearing that wondrous sound that never fails to persuade me to join a game of basketball. From primary school until now, I'm still playing this great sport, though I'm playing it for the joys of the sport, rather than for the sake of improving my skills.

Soccer-
The one game in my life, which I am sure I won't live without it. The pure pleasure you derive from a goal you score, the absolute joy when you strike a volley into the top corner of the net, the indescribable feeling you get from a long range strike or even a simple tap in. Ever since I picked up this sport in my Secondary One days, it had never ever left my life. In fact, it inscribe such a mark in my life, that I strive to improve my skills every single day. No way would you see me reject a soccer match, 90 minutes or simply street soccer. One dream of mine when I was still naive was to become a professional soccer player, but when I realised the impossibility of it, that dream fade away. But my passion for football never did. I still chase every Manchester United game on my TV, every derby showdown, and every finals of every competition. But ah, pity that we live in small old Singapore, when the chances of making it big in the game aren't even there.

Manchester United 2 Bolton 1. This result blew the title race open, and the gap is cut to seven points. With Chelsea drawing 0 – 0 against Birmingham, imagine how I’m feeling now.

Music-
To be honest, I have no qualms with any forms of music. Classical, pop, rock, metal, anything. In fact, I listen to many different genres with ease and pleasure. I can't imagine life without music, it's as if it's my invisible friend. When I'm on a high, pop-punk music kicks in. Moody or lovesick, and there's never a lack of love songs on my playlist. Full of angst or just wanting to punch that someone on the face and metal or rock music provides just the thing for a bad-tempered afternoon.

Guitar-
I've two guitars at home. A classical and an electric. I aspire to be a world-renowned guitarist one day, and it seems impossible but well, I might as well give it a try. Playing every form of music on the guitar is already a daily habit, and though I boast of no amazing skills or rhythm, I'm planning on improving them right after my 'O' Levels Exams.

Writing-
The second of my aspirations. Writing is one way of expressing myself (or blogging) and since young; I've always enjoyed writing. English is one subject I love totally, but the teacher in my current English class isn't really an interesting one. Well, I love every comment made on my compositions, be it good or bad ones. I find writing simply pleasurable, when I can just spin up the wildest story and I can puppet the entire cast in it. Life would be pretty bland without words.

After cell group today, I stayed back for a while in Jac's house and played the guitar, some pool, before deciding to go back. Evangeline followed and we walked to the bus stop. Her bus came soon after, and I waited for guess who! Eve and Amadea! (: Haha, they came in Amadea's dad lorry and we went to Eve's pretty house. Her house is really pretty inside, her bedroom with orange curtains and everything. We ate popcorn chicken, orange juice peeled by our sweetest Eve and chocolates. I'm not afraid of Amadea! I thought I was since we haven't met so long but no, she's still the Amadea I know, super funny and super niceee. Her brother is the cutest thing ever; I got like three hugs from him? He's addicted to picture taking, taking picture of everything in the kitchen. He's just absolutely cuteeeee. Making really funny comments and action. And and and, we played the guitar! Eleazar and me. (: I <3 him, lots! Thank you, Eve, for the message you tried sending to my phone with my phone (To: You, cuteee). You're still as lovely as ever, and you and Amadea are some of the greatest friends I've had.

To Eve, Amadea, Eleazar.
You three are the best company I could ever ask for. <3
I LOVE EVE AND AMADEA THE MOST-EST.

My week wasn't really good, my two maths test (E-maths & A-maths) were not really well done, partly because I got too complacent. But then again, it sorta ended really well because of that trip to Eve's. With love, thank you! <3